Well, the end of the year is creeping up on us. For those of you who have finished Uni once and for all, I wish you all the best in the big people’s world, for those of you who are staying for another year or two (or 3 or 4 or 5); hopefully I will get to (dis)grace your presences next year, if they let me keep writing.

Anywho…Halloween is coming up shortly and you know what that means don’t you? Yes, that’s right, after Halloween is the time that stores nationwide go nuts and get all Christmassy. There will be some of us people out there that are smart enough to have most of our pressie shopping out the way by the time Guy Fawkes rolls around and there will be some of you who will be doing the last minute dash for the malls. Tsk tsk says I.

Well, actually, good luck with that.

There’s nothing I can’t stand more than a mall (just ask Lisa, she knows about the freak out in the big city with all the lights and the stuffs), except for Christmas shopping in a mall. Having to fight over an item that is on “sale” (after being bumped up by 25% a couple of weeks before, just because its THAT time of year), when I could have bought that exact item halfway through the year for a quarter of the price. Ah yes, Christmas, the time when even the cutest little old ladies turn into evil, grab-everything-in-sight-whilst-clawing-your-eyeballs-out imps. The time of year when children won’t go to sleep coz they’re just too excited and half of them want to see Santa. Do you remember those days? I swear I even heard sleigh bells once. I used to love when the pressies started to mount up under the tree, I would always be that shit-head little kid that would go and slightly pick at the wrapping to see what was in them. As you get older though, Christmas just isn’t the same, not when YOU are the one buying the presents, although with saying that, having kids makes it all worthwhile. Nothing like Christmas morning, having the kids round the tree, tearing the paper off and looking highly disappointed and then telling you that “Jimmy next door has the better version”. Well, f**k that little Jimmy next door, his mum is rich after her divorce…. Bloody kids eh? You can never win.

Anyways, what are you all getting up to for your holidays? Anything exciting?

You have to love the fact that we have the great kiwi summers. I couldn’t imagine being curled up round a fireplace all rugged up at Christmas and New Years time. I love being out there with fishing rod in hand, lazing in the sun, having the dolphins playing just over by the horizon… Ahhh yes, roll on summer. Not this half arsed summer but the REAL summer. Sunburn, blisters, game fishing, smelly bait hands, hooks in feet, oh yes, this is summer.

Last summer, I happened to score a mint job up in the far north, painting a friend’s house that was on the beachfront. It was fantastic finishing work at 9.30 am and buggering off to 90-Mile Beach for a fish. Oh and you can’t forget that paint needs time to dry, so what a coincidence that there’s a beach at the doorstep, I would NOT recommend sunbathing nude on the beach in the far north, aside from the man in the 4×4 driving past a few times having a look, the sun up there is just harsh. I couldn’t sit down for 3 days, after that I had to sit on a pillow for another week. Although, this summer, I don’t think that I will be allowed to soak up too much sun. After all, a woman in my condition needs to take care of herself. Yep, that’s right; Redneck Beck has a belly full of arms and legs. (Hey Luke, I told you it was gonna be a doozy). Now I know a couple of you are going to be calling me and saying “wtf” but what can I say, he talked me into it.

So now that I have dropped my bombshell, I hope you all have a great summer and enjoy your holidays and hopefully I will be allowed to write again next year.

Thanks for reading, love y’all.